Saying Sorry
Saying Sorry
Saying Sorry
- December 1, 2016
- Posted by: MAYURI
- Category: Articles
Saying Sorry
Why is this so difficult? Most among us find it very hard to apologise to others. In fact, we refuse to acknowledge that we were wrong about something.
It leads to many problems
- Lingering disquiet that refuses to away
- Embarrassment in dealing with that person again
- Worry about how we are being judged by the others
- Regret that an opportunity to set things right has been lost
- No way to arrive at a closure to that unfortunate event
- Finding it harder to apologise in later situations
- Not saying sorry becoming a habitual pattern of behaviour
- And gradually internalising the idea that one was actually not wrong and need not have said sorry at all
- And finally, reaching a state where one refuses to acknowledge being wrong in anything, anytime
- Consequently one is fighting a losing battle to always finding a way to justify that one was right all the time and the others were at fault all the time.
- Leading to break up in relationships
What comes in the way of saying sorry?
- Ego, the bane in the human being’s life that interferes at most junctures, interferes here too in a big way
- Prejudice, which makes one think the other is not worthy of one’s apology; too insignificant, does not deserve it, younger person etc are the thoughts.
- Worry that it means one is guilty of bad behaviour and is acknowledging that fact
- Fear that the other one will take advantage of one in future
What can one do about this?
Some preconditions help:
- Recognising when to say sorry. There are any number of people who don’t even realise that they are being rude, insensitive, arrogant, interfering and unsympathetic towards others, which demand an apology
- At the first opportunity one must be able to say sorry, for this one needs to have secure self-esteem which stops the ego going on a trip
- Confidence in oneself that one is not appearing weak in the situation
- Good feeling towards the other who is to receive one’s apology
- Capacity to use words of explanation that are appropriate and do not demean self or insult the other
- Saying sorry must be done in such a way that both are able to smile back at each other and good feeling is restored
- Making it a habit is good. One cannot expect to receive apologies when one is unwilling to give one.
If I have hurt someone’s feeling with this, I am sorry about that!
saying sorry is something like saying thank you…it has become a custom … automatic sayings without any meaning…we learned from westerners…they express everything in words and action…we Indians do not do it…only now after many of us are westernized we say sorry and thank you…
nice article illustrated with many instances…read it…
I really enjoyed going through the article. It is so difficult for most people to say sorry even if they are wrong and don’t mind ruining relationships or loosing friends. A simple word said wholeheartedly gets a lot of peace and happiness than the grief of loosing a friend or relation!
Heartfelt ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’ are the only two words which builds and strengthens the relationship. Ego trip is the only trip which reaches you nowhere. Say ‘go’ to ‘ego’ then we are comfortable in saying ‘sorry’!