Making choices in life

Whole lot of us have a wide range of choices to make in life. But many of us hardly realise this. We think we are stuck in a groove and cannot manoeuvre out of it. Some issues related to this phenomena:

• For many of us, making up our mind all on our own is not possible. We seek opinions and advice from others. I wonder how anybody else can peep into one’s own psyche to understand what advice to give!
• Most times we are worried if we are presented with multiple choices. We fervently wish for fewer alternatives.
• Strangely many of us do not recognise an opportunity to enhance our life too. We by pass a great one once in a while, not realising its potential
• We have a problem of making realistic assessment of ourselves. When we do not know what we will be capable of or what will suit our personality best, how is it possible to make choices?
• Most of us do not have a realistic assessment of where we want to be at any given point of time, let alone where we want to go in near future or long off future. So, choices cannot be made.
• We drift in life, hoping things will settle by themselves and life un knots itself in our favour.
• We are bewildered when life gets more and more complicated and at every turn there are serious choices to be made.
• We let opportunities pass by and regret and worse still, blame others for not being able to take the choices

    Many instances in life can be seen right from childhood

• Going to this school or that
• What second language to take in school?
• Friends!!! Whom to befriend and whom to avoid like the plague?
• Specialization subjects in school and college; mostly we bend to parental pressure
• Choice of institution, again we say parental pressure
• Choice of career, we want SAFE job. Cannot dream of anything even a little out of the ordinary
• God forbid, have a choice of two jobs, generally the one the pays more, is close to your safe haven is chosen, not realising if it suits one’s talent, personality or interests.
• Choice of life partner!!! Indian boys and girls are lucky; mostly parents struggle to find someone suitable, but still should I marry this girl or the other one? Is a question that plagues many youngsters.
• Many times the regret that ’I should have chosen the other’ is felt by both.

   Some ways in which we can handle this problem: 

• Introspection: who am I? what do I want from life? What will make me contented and happy? What am I capable of? These are crucial pieces of self-knowledge we must acquire if we want to make good choices in life
• Future planning: don’t drift in life. Plan for it. When there is a plan, you will see clarity in all the choices available
• Seek advice of persons you trust. Only then you will follow advice. Do not ask all and sundry to give you a piece of their mind on your problem; it can make you a butt of many jokes and lead to no useful advice.
• Think threadbare on the pros and cons of the choices you make. Check to see if the positives outweigh the negatives
• Work hard towards the choices you make and make them work.
• Not easy to do. But one must have the courage to do so. If you don’t have the courage, take

advice, but never crib about that advice going sour.

Bottom line? Be responsible for your life, don’t let others take over. Good or bad, have the satisfaction that the choices were all yours.